"How do I go to a wedding solo and not get stranded alone, swaying to another cover of Wagon Wheel?!"
what it's like feeling foreign, being far away and trying to make your dreams match up to reality
Wait, But What? is our weekly advice column for paid supporters. If you’ve got a burning life question (whether it’s how to phoenix out of a dark spot or how to stand up to a boss who thinks you're just in the room to grab a flat white), drop your question here, and we might just answer it!
Bellll ugh, help me get out of this spiral. I’m going to a wedding soon, but I’m going solo. It’s the first time I’ve been to one alone and I’m weirdly anxious about it… like - who do I talk to? What do I do? Why am I single after all these years?
How do I not end up alone in the corner swaying to a cover of ‘Wagon Wheel’? I’m fine being single (most of the time) but there’s something about weddings that kinda… undoes me and I don’t know what to do about it. Help.
Dear Old Crow Medicine Show,
At first, when I read this question I thought Lucy was pranking me.
No, seriously. I nearly spat my drink out across the table (in a cute, laughing way) because, most summers, I too spend this season saving up and ferrying myself around to various wineries and converted barns to overpriced Air BnBs, cramming my kitten heels into a carry on suitcase, watching friends be in love, and feeling similar feelings sometimes too.
Let me be clear: j’adore a wedding. J’adore love love. I’m a sentimental romantic freak and watching people be so happy and certain in front of a handselected, immaculately dressed people in a chaotic world is the kind of showbiz I wake up and live for.
But they also make me selfish. It’s almost impossible not to sit in the procession of a wedding wondering what’s happened in your own life, what might happen in the future, and whether someone’s aunty is going to subtly bully you all night for flying solo, no matter how accomplished or chill girl you feel on the inside.
Luckily for you, this is not my first rodeo, and I’ve worked out how to phoenix in these situations and my advice is as follows: