"How do I move to a new city and...eek... what should I expect?"
what it's like feeling foreign, being far away and trying to make your dreams match up to reality
Wait, But What? is our weekly advice column for paid supporters. If you’ve got a burning life question (whether it’s how to phoenix out of a dark spot or how to stand up to a boss who thinks you're just in the room to grab a flat white), drop your question here, and we might just answer it!
Bel, help. I’ve quit my job and am moving countries in a couple of weeks, and I’m SO NERVOUS.
I have no idea what I’m doing, what to expect (keep Googling images and going down city TikTok holes just to be able to imagine it), whether I’m going to like it and how it will even feel… any advice?
Dear on the precipice,
Congratulations on doing something that makes you feel alive in this permaweirdcrisis, will my job even exist tomorrow, how can I find simple joys in the chaos kind of world.
No, seriously.
You could have opted for a haircut, or buying an e-bike, or a ceramics night school, but no. You have chosen one of the most challenging (and exciting) things of all: to pack your whole life into a suitcase and see just how accurate Emily In Paris really is. You probably already know the answer, but there’s knowing that and then going and experiencing it for yourself.
As my gorgeous friend put to me once when I was super emo months into moving to Lisbon (and not to self-aggrandise here, but I think it’s useful):
If it was easy, every bitch would be doing it.
You can never know if this is the right move, but you can give it a red, hot go and opt for a life where you don’t die wondering. And God, well, she loves a trier.
Here’s what I do know from the experience of doing it myself over and over again that I hope helps calm your nerves: