John Oliver is interfering in NZ's most important election

+ Have Taylor Swift fans been lining up for five months ahead of her Argentina shows?

and

Nov 07, 2023

Coming at you live after attending my first (of hopefully many) quiz nights here in Lisbon where I made some new pals over some organised fun, and didn’t get home until 12am! Lisbon huh! Genuinely thought that I had my best quiz performance EVER until we let out the biggest cheer for getting third place, only to realise that every other team was second equal, except for the winners. So… we lost. But we had a great time and I’m hoping it will fill my Monday nights for weeks to come.

Also!! The winners of our Dolly Alderton giveaway have been selected (and notified) but if you didn’t win it via us, her new book Good Material is out now!! It might even be worth getting your hands on early as I know of a certain book club that might be doing it as their December pick….

John Oliver is interfering in New Zealand’s most important election
‘Grenade among birthday gifts’ kills adviser to Ukraine’s military chief
Bel Chimes In: On Unhinging
Have Taylor Swift fans been lining up for five months ahead of her Argentina shows?
Some things I want you to read!

John Oliver is interfering in New Zealand’s most important election

Last night I got this DM from my friend Ezra back in NZ:

This is important because last year Ezra approached me saying that he was applying to be the campaign manager for the pūteketeke (Australasian Crested Grebe) and asked whether we could help him out if he got the gig. We said yes - we’re always rooting for the underdog (under-bird?) but by the time he applied someone had beaten him to it by a number of hours. This year he reapplied but was told he’d been beaten out again, this time by a ‘fairly large media org’ from overseas.

As it turns out, the new campaign manager for the pūteketeke is none other than JOHN OLIVER.

John Oliver has launched a global campaign (with billboards in New Zealand, Japan, France, the UK, India, Wisconsin and even a plane with a pūteketeke banner which flew over the beaches of Rio de Janeiro) to interfere with New Zealand's relatively small ‘Bird of the Year’(or Bird of the Century this time around) competition.

I’m not entirely sure why he chose this bird, but as he describes them, the pūteketeke are “weird puking birds with colourful mullets” (they eat hundreds of their feathers to line their stomachs before vomiting them back up again) - “so what’s not to love?”

To be clear, it all seems in good fun, and I dare say this will be the biggest voter turnout NZ has ever seen for this competition, so if you’re interested in voting for his choice, you can head to the website he made for the birds HERE!!

‘Grenade among birthday gifts’ kills adviser to Ukraine’s military chief

In far more devastating news, a close adviser to the commander-in-chief of Ukraine’s army has been killed after a grenade amongst his birthday presents exploded.

Maj Hennadiy Chastyakov, 39, had returned to his flat with presents from his colleagues and was opening them with his son when the grenade exploded.

It was first reported as a suspected assassination, until Ukraine’s interior minister, Igor Klymenko, released a statement saying the advisor had actually been “showing his son a box with grenades inside that he had received as a gift.”

“At first, the son took the munition in his hands and began to turn the ring. Then the serviceman took the grenade away from the child and pulled the ring, causing a tragic explosion,” Klymenko said.
Prosecutors clarified later that he had accidentally set off the grenade while trying to take it away from his son.

Police say that his 13-year-old son was also "seriously injured,” and that they’ve identified the soldier who gave him the gift, and an investigation is underway.

This section is written by my crush, the refreshing-as-a-house-chardonnay-on-a-steamy-day, Bel Hawkins. She also writes our Sunday newsletter ‘No News is Good News’ which all our paying supporters receive. Upgrade your plan to get her newsy here!

Bel Chimes In: On Unhinging

Hi crushes,

Writing you this from what is soon to be day 9 of being sick in bed with the flu and at that point where you've almost forgotten what real life is. Living? Laughing? Getting dressed? Buying a Bounty Bar from the convenience store? This is why the theme of this Chime is 'unhingeaneo' and all the other things related to that for me right now that you didn't ask for but are now receiving! Detailed below.

Saying: 'Unhingeaneo' - a gorge extension of the word 'unhinged' when that simply won't cut it. Best deployed when describing someone's behaviour. It also sounds Italian, which is obviously chic.

Listening: My friends’ So Much So Much Soundcloud sets, this Jorja Smith cover of Harry Styles (also j'adore the female percussionist, natch), my morning commute playlist even though it is currently from the teapot on the kitchen bench back to bed and obviously Dido's 'White Flag'.

Watching: Ancient Egypt documentaries which are my Roman Empire. This is now also a public outreach for any top recommendations for anything in this genre.

Reading: Nora Ephron is always my comfort read and I've just finished 'I Remember Nothing: And Other Reflections'. This means it's also time to get onto Fourth Wing for our Book Club! Join us.

Wondering: I've been doing some AMA's on my IG every Sunday or so to try and help quell all these existentialisms floating around us atm. Come join? I'll also be giving fuller answers in my Sunday No News Is Good News if you're a ~ paying subscriber ~

Dreaming about: A lunch. A big lunch. With clams and a small side of warm gluten-free bread. Attended people you like (both strangers and friends). No one has their phones or the internet to check what anyone else is doing. It's close to the holidays so no one really cares about work anymore. Keep the green wine coming.

Yearning for: A ceasefire.

See you this weekend when I'm going to be using my years of slithering grimy Birkentstocks into a backpack and nomading around the world to help make sense of someone's Big Life Questions about whether you should travel or work in your 20s.

Cool K Love You, Bye! xo

Have Taylor Swift fans been lining up for five months ahead of her Argentina shows?

Yes. When I saw a headline about Swifites lining up for FIVE MONTHS ahead of her Argentina shows I had to do a double take. Five MONTHS YOU SAY???? That’s dedication. If you want a taste of who these fans are, read this from Pitchfork:

“We’ve been in this tent for five months,” says a 21-year-old Swiftie waiting outside Buenos Aires’ River Plate Stadium. The rumble of a mixing truck can be heard through the tent’s thin fabric, while a large group of ants hopes for a snack to fall to the ground on a nearby sidewalk. The fan prefers to remain anonymous, because her father doesn’t know she’s been spending many afternoons—in between working a part-time job and taking college classes—in a small, makeshift encampment alongside her fellow Taylor Swift loyalists since June. “I usually tell my dad I’m at a park drinking mate with somebody, or visiting a friend of mine who lives near the stadium,” she adds.

Pitchfork (in a GREAT scoop) has reported that hundreds of fans have been occupying four tents outside the stadium she’s set to perform in Buenos Aires. They’ve got a well-planned roster (spreadsheets are involved of course) to keep track of everyone, which tracks how many hours everyone has spent lining up. The more time you spend in tents, you see, the closer you’re allowed to be to the front. One fan even says she’s spent 300 total hours in the tents.

The line between dedication and insanity is a thin one here, but if you want to read the whole story, I’d highly rec!