"My friend is having a hard time trying to get pregnant - how can I best support her?"
On supporting your friends through hard times and loving them until it reaches the walls 𓆩♡𓆪
Wait, But What? is our weekly advice column for paid supporters. If you’ve got a burning life question (whether it’s how to phoenix out of a dark spot, or how to stand up to a boss who thinks you're just in the room to grab a flat white) drop your question here and we might just answer it!
"Bel, bit of a different Q this week… My friend is 18 months into trying to get pregnant and I’m wondering how I can be a good friend to her? I’m not planning to have kids myself, and others in our group have fallen pregnant over this time. But after months of watching her go through this… I’m wondering what can I do? And say?"
Dear watching, waiting,
This question really hit me today. Not because I have children (or even know if I want to go on that journey myself) but because I think, whether this stage of life is relatable to you or not, the feeling of watching someone else’s struggle with something totally out of your control is universal.
It’s like, kill me now if I turn into that friend who brings pink cupcakes over and recommends you trying a new herbal tea you saw on TikTok promoting better luck in life.
Plus, we spend so much of our lives now looking through windows at the way others are doing it, it’s like a constant parallel feeling. That good fortune and perfection is always happening out there to other people, and this feeling’s especially magnified when it’s not happening to you.