what your podcast listening speed says about you

once I figure out how to put real people on 1.5x speed, its over for the rest of you

A few months ago I was cooking dinner while listening to The Daily on 1.5x speed, when my Dad walked in and visibly freaked out.

“What the hell is that?” he said, picking up my phone and fumbling around trying to mute it.

“Um, a podcast?” I replied.

“But why does it sound like that???”

“Oh,” I shrugged. “It’s just sped up because it works better for me that way.”

*Normy freaks out*

“No wonder you’re on edge all the bloody time Lucy, you’re don’t give yourself a second to think when you’re listening to things in this way!!” he said, leaving the kitchen.

Since that day he’s continued to give me shit about the speed I listen to podcasts.

For me, 1.5x is the sweet spot. It makes Britanny Broski funnier. It makes the preamble from the hosts I don’t care about bearable. It helps me process the education being hurled at me in the pods I force myself to listen to.

It’s perfect, and I thought we all did it.