a list of things that are embarrassing for no reason
brought on by having to relive the most embarro moment of my life
The other day I was talking to a friend about the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me. Now, I know it’s not a competition, but I genuinely think I would win the most embarrassing moment of all time if it was. My story is really bad. My story would ruin a lesser woman. My story means that I have found very few things embarrassing since.
Annoyingly, I’m not going to tell you that story. But, reliving it made me realise that there are some strange little things, that, for those of us who reside on the anxious side of life (love u love u love u), can feel really embarro for no reason, and something compelled me to write them all down.
As you know, when I’m compelled to write something it either means that I should share it, because it’s likely you’re all gonna relate, OR, I should keep it tucked up in this brain of mine. For this one, I’m choosing the former.
A list of things that are embarrassing for no reason
Walking towards someone you’re meeting up with
Someone holding the door open for you when you’re too far away
Exiting from the middle of a row, anywhere
Putting your change back in your wallet at the counter
When you trip over and turn it into a jog
When someone walks in on you singing so you change to a silly voice
Walking back after your turn in bowling
Walking out of a store without buying anything
Trying to find a spare seat in any given situation
Walking the wrong way and having to turn back
Trying on clothes in a changing room & liking none of them
Having Happy Birthday sung to you
Opening presents in front of people
Waving across a bunch of people
Getting up off the bus
Blowing your nose in public
Being hit by a car and being okay
Manoeuvring aeroplane aisles
Getting a wedgie in public
Not knowing how to pronounce something on a menu when you order it
Saying hi to someone at the supermarket & continuing to bump into them for the rest of the tip
Everything to do with elevators
Taking too long to pack your groceries after you’ve paid
Tying your shoe in public
Walking across a pedestrian crossing
Being on a bike stopped at traffic lights
Handing in your exam when you’ve finished
Saying goodbye and then walking the same way
Reading something someone has written for you in front of them
Passing people when walking or jogging who are going really similar speeds to you
Asking for the price of something & not buying it
Running after tennis/ping pong balls
Yawning when someone is talking to you
When your shoes squeak
Carrying toilet paper home from the supermarket
When you’re dog poos while you’re walking it
When someone knocks on the bathroom door and you have to let them know it’s occupied
Correcting a wrong order
Walking up the stairs with people behind you
Parking in a busy area
Walking anywhere with someone you barely know
Running to get somewhere in normal clothes/ with a backpack
Your card being declined
Not hearing someone and making them repeat what they said
This list is NON-EXHAUSTIVE so let me know the things you find embarrassing OR let me know if you think I just need therapy x
Wind screen wipers on the fastest setting
Spelling your name for someone and then having to re-spell it coz they keep getting it wrong