a list of things that are embarrassing for no reason

brought on by having to relive the most embarro moment of my life

The other day I was talking to a friend about the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me. Now, I know it’s not a competition, but I genuinely think I would win the most embarrassing moment of all time if it was. My story is really bad. My story would ruin a lesser woman. My story means that I have found very few things embarrassing since.

Annoyingly, I’m not going to tell you that story. But, reliving it made me realise that there are some strange little things, that, for those of us who reside on the anxious side of life (love u love u love u), can feel really embarro for no reason, and something compelled me to write them all down.

As you know, when I’m compelled to write something it either means that I should share it, because it’s likely you’re all gonna relate, OR, I should keep it tucked up in this brain of mine. For this one, I’m choosing the former.

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A list of things that are embarrassing for no reason

• Walking towards someone you’re meeting up with

• Someone holding the door open for you when you’re too far away

• Exiting from the middle of a row, anywhere

• Putting your change back in your wallet at the counter

• When you trip over and turn it into a jog

• When someone walks in on you singing so you change to a silly voice 

• Walking back after your turn in bowling

• Walking out of a store without buying anything

• Trying to find a spare seat in any given situation

• Walking the wrong way and having to turn back

• Trying on clothes in a changing room & liking none of them

• Having Happy Birthday sung to you

• Opening presents in front of people

• Waving across a bunch of people

• Getting up off the bus

• Blowing your nose in public

• Being hit by a car and being okay

• Manoeuvring aeroplane aisles

• Getting a wedgie in public

• Not knowing how to pronounce something on a menu when you order it

• Saying hi to someone at the supermarket & continuing to bump into them for the rest of the tip

• Everything to do with elevators

• Taking too long to pack your groceries after you’ve paid

• Tying your shoe in public

• Walking across a pedestrian crossing

• Being on a bike stopped at traffic lights

• Handing in your exam when you’ve finished

• Saying goodbye and then walking the same way

• Reading something someone has written for you in front of them

• Passing people when walking or jogging who are going really similar speeds to you

• Asking for the price of something & not buying it

• Running after tennis/ping pong balls

• Yawning when someone is talking to you

• When your shoes squeak

• Carrying toilet paper home from the supermarket

• When you’re dog poos while you’re walking it

• When someone knocks on the bathroom door and you have to let them know it’s occupied

• Correcting a wrong order

• Walking up the stairs with people behind you

• Parking in a busy area

• Walking anywhere with someone you barely know

• Running to get somewhere in normal clothes/ with a backpack

• Your card being declined

• Not hearing someone and making them repeat what they said

This list is NON-EXHAUSTIVE so let me know the things you find embarrassing OR let me know if you think I just need therapy x