What Are You Afraid Of?

For me it's not TikTok, it's not drag queens... it's guns.

shit you should care about

and

Bel Hawkins

Mar 28, 2023

Ok first of all can we talk about the first episode of Succession!!???? Ugh my fave show and the gift that keeps on giving (except this is the last season and we have to wait a week between releases so… it doesn’t really keep on giving at all.)

If any of you aren’t on this bandwagon but want a very luxe, sometimes hard-to-understand (but always entertaining and hilar) show about the media industry & family drama, come and watch my new reality show! lol jk but come and watch Succession.

Also come and be a Close Friend for all my thoughts on it 👀

🔔 Bel Chimes In: What are you... afraid of?🔔
Another mass shooting in the USA
Mythbust: Is there such a thing as ‘breaking the seal?’

🔔 Bel Chimes In: What are you... afraid of?🔔

This section is written by my crush, the refreshing-as-a-house-chardonnay-on-a-steamy-day, Bel Hawkins. She also writes our Sunday newsletter ‘No News is Good News’ which all our paying supporters receive. Upgrade your plan to get her newsy here!

Crushes! Wow it's nearly April which means we've been hanging out in these Chimes for almost one whole year! And when that anniversary comes, I think I might take the liberty to resupply the funniest/most heartfelt moments we've had here because we can always tell by what comes back through the inbox (j'adore j'adore your messages) as a validating swoon on this just being the cutest place on the internet. Plus, well, it's always good to be cute about it.

On that note — is there a topic I'm missing you're despo to see unpacked in the newsy? If so, comment below and I'll get to work!

In the meantime, I saw the Guardian post this story the other day (Insta link for snackable content and no paywalls), featuring snippets of what 11-14-year-old kids say they're most afraid about. Things like:

"I'm afraid of getting too caught up in work and separated from the people I care about"
"I'm afraid of failing in whatever my job is and not having money"
"I'm afraid of losing my job and not having a stable income to get an apartment or house to live in"
*end on something hopeful* "I'm not afraid of anything!"

Why did it give me so much ache?

Ugh, I think just like, scary/sad/confronting to realise anxiety about our current state of being in a Permacrisis (yes, seamless integration of our Shit Show episode last week, you can listen to here) infiltrating the lives of kids at a time they should be devoid of worrying about Big Life Stuff.

What's the fix here? What are you afraid of? What can we do about it? It's hard not to keep harping on to one another about living in the present. Meditating. Being grateful. Simplifying. And other kind of stretch canvas sayings that tell you that the beach is that way! Chill zone here! Go With The Flow!

Two of my family members are really sick at the moment, and I'm worried about them. I'm worried about what will change. I'm worried about not having enough money. I worry often about not being good enough at my job or not writing right. Or that I'm not making enough time for friends / cooking anything other than a Lad Bible dinner/sleeping/having fun.

It reminds me of this Mary Oliver poem, which I'll leave you with. Because I don't have the answers, and I don't have the tonics, but I do have a feeling everything will change, and we can only control a certain amount of things, and if we do our best with that, that's often the best that we can do.

Til next week! Or for 💘paying subscribers💘 see you this weekend for a lol tale from a day in the life of… me.

Cool K love you bye!

Another school shooting in the USA

Content warning: gun violence

Yesterday, six people (three children and three adults) were killed at a private Christian campus in Nashville by a heavily armed ex-student.

The main suspect, Audrey Hale, was a 28-year-old who had “planned extensively for the violence” by drawing out maps of the school with details about surveillance, and was carrying two assault rifles and a handgun with her. She was fatally shot at the scene by a police officer, but not before she’d killed six people.

According to the BBC, those people are:

Hallie Scruggs, 9, who was the daughter of Chad Scruggs, senior pastor at Covenant Presbyterian Church.
Evelyn Dieckhaus, 9, who was in the third grade. Her sister, who is two years older, cried during the service according to the Tennessean newspaper.
William Kinney, 9, who was also a student at the Covenant School.
Michael Hill, 61, who was a custodian at the school. Tim Dunavant, a pastor at Harstville First United Methodist Church, said he had previously worked at the Covenant and had hired Mr Hill over 13 years ago.
Cynthia Peak, 61, who was a substitute teacher working at the school on the day of the attack, police have said.
Katherine Koonce, 60, who was the head of school at Covenant. "She did so much for those kids," said one mother, who has two children enrolled at Covenant. "And now gave her life protecting them."

In a press conference that’s just been held, Nashville police chief John Drake said that the suspect “purchased seven firearms legally from five different stores prior to yesterday's tragedy” and that her family told authorities Hale had been in treatment for an "emotional disorder."

"Her parents felt she should not own weapons," Drake says. "She had been hiding several weapons within the house."

But, Tennessee doesn’t have ‘Red Flag laws’ (which permit officials to remove guns from people they believe may present a danger to others or themselves) like some other states do. And in case you were getting hopeful about reform, this is Rep. Andy Ogles, a Republican who represents the Nashville district where the school is. Don’t worry though, he offered up ‘thoughts and prayers.’ 🙃

Shannon Watts @shannonrwatts

THIS is last year's Christmas card from Tennessee Rep. Andy Ogles, a Republican who represents the district that Covenant School is in in Nashville. #tnleg

I hate waking up to write about shit like this for you - I’m so goddamn sorry that I have to SO often.

shityoushouldcareabout

A post shared by SHIT YOU SHOULD CARE ABOUT (@shityoushouldcareabout)

Mythbust: Is there such a thing as breaking the seal?

So this poll yesterday POPPED OFF.

75% of you said yes there is such a thing as breaking the seal (and you call it funny things like ‘FFP’ for ‘Fatal First Piss’)
18% said no there isn’t such a thing
the rest of you just wanted to click something

Healthline (and other sources) said that breaking the seal is not real - meaning that the first time you pee while you’re drinking doesn’t just cause ‘the seal to open’ for the rest of the night.

“Turns out, the whole idea of breaking the seal isn’t true. Peeing after you’ve started drinking won’t make you have to go any more or less in the coming hours.”

BUT, as a bunch of you commented, you WILL need to pee more when you’re drinking - and that’s science.

New bestie Gemma Styles commented

“I think it’s true-ish — the alcohol inhibits a hormone that basically means more of the water goes into your bladder and less into your blood? You can’t just hold the first pee forever though”

Another follower commented:

fun fact! the reason that this happens is because alcohol inhibits vasopressin which is a hormone that signals the kidneys to hold on to water; when it’s inhibited and can’t send those signals, the kidneys aren’t up-taking the water so it just goes right on through you. maybe i say “my vasopressin is inhibited!!” every time i break the seal

And an article on CBS said:

While "breaking the seal" remains an urban legend, alcohol does have a real impact on the bladder and the urge to urinate. Drinking alcohol—whether it's one whiskey or three PBRs—intensifies the need to go.
“It can be shots, beer, volume isn’t necessary. The key thing is that [alcohol] produces the increased need to urinate,” explains James Zacny, associate professor of anesthesia and critical care at University of Chicago Medicine.
Alcohol consumption suppresses vasopressin, also known as anti-diuretic hormone. The pituitary gland in the brain releases ADH, which regulates water in your kidneys.
“Alcohol simply blocks the normal release of vasopressin … [vasopressin] promotes re-absorption of water in the kidney to the rest of the body. If you have this blocked, the water goes into the body,” Zacny adds.

So there you go! You won’t ‘break the seal’ but you will generally have to pee more than usual!